The senior class of Bridgeport High School did an outstanding job at honoring his memory. Principal LeClair said to me tonight…” gone but never forgotten”

I have to commend and congratulate “Our Boys”, that’s what we call them. Dustin’s best friends for many years before he past away, our sons. Nick, Brandon, Johny and Marc… they all graduated tonight and with the help of a very special teacher, Mrs. Michelle Tolles they did an incredible job honoring his memory.

The senior class did a fundraiser to purchase a bench in Dustin’s memory and it was placed in the courtyard of the high school today. The best part is, they had $500 left over from the fundraiser in which they placed as a scholarship in Dustin’s name. A young man that was one of Dustin’s best friends received the scholarship to pursuer his goal of being a pediatrician. Nick received the scholarship and he also released the balloons in his honor for graduation.

You see, the school actually went above and beyond much more than we expected. At commencements tonight they placed a chair where Dustin would have sat with a ribbon on it and they called his name as they would have if he would’ve been there. When his name was called, Nick released two balloons in Dustin’s memory…incredible.

This was bitter sweet for us because as much as we loved seeing “Our Boys” receive their diploma in their cap and gown, it was heartbreaking to see that empty chair with a simple bow instead of seeing our son sitting there.

As much as I love those boys and as happy as we were, we waited to go down on the field after graduation. We wanted to take the bow as our memory but in no way did I want to spoil their happy day, considering the fact that I was not happy like they were.

Bitter Sweet…we could never thank anyone enough for the tremendous support of remembering Dustin, yet we could not be as happy as they were that they had a whole life ahead of them.

We miss you Dustin and we thank the Bridgeport High School Senior Class for giving us that little minute of glory in our son’s memory. We wouldn’t have had that without Nick, Brandon, Johny, Marc and Michelle…Thank you.

I wanted to give people a sense of what we are all about so of course I went straight to the About Us page. That led me into the posts I wrote about clearing the sidewalks, which are my most passionate posts. As we were looking through a post I wrote in December of 2007 we clicked on a video link I had placed from the local news station. We were surprised that we could still watch it and it had been a while so we did.

The reporter was interviewing a Township board member about businesses not clearing the sidewalks and how it was a reoccurring problem then

 BAMMM…

“The Accident”

On the video were scenes from the morning our son was killed. There it was right in our face  

Footage of his bike under the SUV

We honestly don’t remember those scenes being in the video or we would prepared ourselves…but it reminds us that even as life moves on that horrific morning will never go away.

The video is a good one, it helped keep at least 50% of the sidewalks clear last year. The Township still doesn’t issue tickets nor do they issue the reminder Mr. Morrison speaks of. This video Bridgeport Businesses Asked to Clear Snow of Sidewalks gives parents like us some type of ammunition against government run institutions that can legally neglect their responsibilities of enforcing codes that can lead to killing kids.

We have many supporters that agree our son would have never been riding his bike in the road if he had a clear sidewalk to travel on…

The Township won’t admit their mistake and they won’t enforce the code. They have spit in our face and in the face of any parent that has lost a child due to the same circumstances. Just because they’re “the government” it doesn’t give them the right to neglect public safety due to the cost of issuing a ticket which actually brings in revenue.

It gets worse…The State Police Post on the side of the road where our son was hit by the car… Well lest just say that we had to call the Township Supervisor last year because they were not shoveling their sidewalks. Every year on the anniversary at the time of Dustin’s accident a group of us go to the cross on the side of the road and light a candle as a tribute to his memory. Last year there was 10 inches of snow across the sidewalk leading to his cross.

So even the State Government could give a shit about the safety of kids riding their bikes to school. That Really Makes Me Boil Over!

That is why organizations like KIDS AND CARS are so important to get the word out about prevention. Founded by Janette E. Fennell the mission of KIDS AND CARS is to assure no child dies or is injured in a non-traffic, motor vehicle related event. At the KIDS AND CARS website you can find mass amounts of information about the prevention of losing a child to the many dangers of a non-traffic, motor vehicle accident. We believe that this information should be printed and given to every licensed driver every time they visit their local Motor Vehicle Office. People especially parents need to beware of the dangers your automobile can pose to your child that is why we must get the word out about KIDS AND CARS. We have raised four children and ourselves never realized that power window strangulation and vehicles put in motion causes the death of many children every year.

The fast growing trend of SUVs and larger vehicles with larger blind spots is contributing to the amount of children being hurt or killed by a motor vehicle. As some of you may know our son was killed by an SUV as are so many other children. People must realize these vehicles are deadly weapons, the SUV that ran over our son was large enough to drag him and his bike underneath it and he was 15 years old. A child that is less than 3 feet tall has no chance at even being seen if they are close enough to an SUV making them most dangerous in your own driveway. KIDS AND CARS has a very informative section on different technology aftermarket options to address the blind zone behind a motor vehicle. They have also teamed up with Advocates for Highway and Auto Safety, and The Consumer’s Union to work with members of Congress to pass bi-partisan legislation that will establish basic safety regulations. KIDS AND CARS provide links to different ways you can help participate in this effort. It is absolutely ridiculous that automakers have not volunteered to make vehicles safer around children, they should visit the KIDS AND CARS website and read the heartbreaking stories of parents that have lost children due to their poorly made cars, that would make them think twice!

The greatest impact KIDS AND CARS had on us were the 45 individual stories that parents have written as a tribute to their child, telling each of their experiences. We have yet to read through all of them as it brings so many painful memories and so much anger that these senseless accidents can be avoided. If you are a parent you must read about these families that have endured so much, and we ask you to support KIDS AND CARS in helping get this important legislation passed. Write your local Congress , donate a little something to KIDS AND CARS, and most important pass the word of their website to anyone who will listen. If just one death of a child is avoided by doing this it makes it all worth it.

You read about tragic car accidents in the news daily, this can be prevented! Drivers must take responsibility behind the wheel. People must realize the consequences of being a careless driver, you always think it won’t happen to you, well it might. Tougher car accident laws are needed, when a person dies in an automobile accident unless there is undoubted proof it was a “freak” accident or both drivers were responsible then there should no questions about charges being filed. These drivers are responsible for hurting or causing the death of other people. They end up hurting not only the family involved, but also their own family, not to mention the many other people that care about both families.

Many of you may know the driver that was responsible for the death of our son was never charged. She was driving an SUV going 45 MPH, never hit the brakes and he was riding his bike, where is the responsibility here? She gets to continue to drive with no consequence for her actions.

Early last week a careless driver claimed the lives of a father and his 5 year old daughter, two local area residents. They were on their way to school for a day of coloring eggs when their van was hit head on by a U.S. Marshal van. The woman that was driving the U.S. Marshal van was going 55 MPH and ran a stop sign, never hitting the brakes. The van that the father and daughter were in rolled several times and they were ejected, both killed. A witness that was behind this woman says

I was behind the white van when this happened and I’m still in shock over what I saw. the black van never stopped. She was doing at the least 55 or faster when she hit them and never even try to stop there is not even any break marks on the pavement where she even tried to hit her breaks & as you can see in the video there is no sun shining if so I would have had my sunglasses on & I didn’t. I’m still trying too figure out in my mind what she was doing to not see this white van coming ….

The driver of the U.S. Marshal van says that the sun blinded her and that is why she hit the van carrying the father and daughter. This happen about 15 miles from our house and I agree with the witness that the sun was not shining and in the video from the news of the accident scene the sun was not shining. THINK about what she said I didn’t see them because the sun was in my eyes, then why the hell did she not slow down! Why would you continue to drive at 55 MPH when you are “blinded”? At this time the police are saying it is unlikely the driver of the Marshal van will be charged.

It is just not right how careless drivers can get away with murder. The next time you are behind the wheel of your car think about what could happen in a split second and what repercussions it could bring. We can all saves lives by slowing down, paying attention and do not multitask while you are driving, you have a deadly weapon in your hands.

Then that “day” happened, the day where LIFE kicks you in the ass, combined with a massive blow to the gut. Although it was two years it always seems like yesterday. It was Monday morning, my husband was home from work because his truck threw the transmission at the end of that previous week. Dustin was getting ready to leave for school, we were talking about today being his first day of wrestling practice. Dustin walked out the door and Darren was still getting ready for school. My husband was taking the dog out and I walked out on the porch, it was a very cold January morning. It was there that we watched our son peddle away on his bike. Shortly after that Darren left for school and we retreated to the computer for the morning news. We heard the emergency sirens and seen the Fire Rescue go by, as we often did, and I said I hate when the sirens go by right after the kids leave. The next thing I remember is Darren running through the door saying “Dustin had been hit by a car.” I will never forget the blood curdling scream I let out, as our daughter screamed and grabbed me. I told her he was fine and we were going to him. My husband was out the door running down the road before I could even comprehend what was happening. I grabbed my coat, tried to calm the kids for a second and I was off too. When I got out the door I could see the traffic was stopped and lined up Dixie Highway. Through the cars I went to the sidewalk and said to myself, these damn sidewalks, I wish they would f***ing shovel. I finally arrived at the police car that was blocking the road, and just grabbed my husband. I just blurted out “what was he wearing”, the officer said a blue coat, the most surreal feeling came over me and for a millisecond, I thought he was fine. I said Dustin had a black coat and then our life shattered, the officer was handed the yellow sports eligibility packet, the same folded packet Dustin had put in his pocket just 15 minutes before. I looked at the officer’s face and she did not have to say anything, We Knew, and again I let out that blood curdling scream.

The sun was rising that morning, to all our surprise we had not seen the sun in almost two weeks. I was in a daze with everything happening around me like a bad nightmare. As I was standing there again on the porch with the sun shining the rage hit, a rage I have never felt before. My blood was boiling and I just wanted to scream I am pissed at LIFE for letting us down! I was angry at everything, the media, the people around me, all the damn decisions you have to make immediately. They say this is a normal grieving process and that it will pass. Two years later, I am still just as angry.

That is why we started Boiled Over, because bad things happen to good people. Ranting and speaking what is on all of our minds is a good release. The one thing we wanted to do when launching this site was to focus on our son and the injustice we felt from the many people involved. The community showed tons of support, we couldn’t ask for more, but we felt a need for people to know the truth about what really happened to Dustin. We have written about the sidewalks, touched on the insurance company and tomorrow we will be posting about the “lazy” police investigation. Tomorrow will be the two year mark.